Today it hit me.  I’m struggling to move on from the stroke, if I move on that means I’ve accepted my life has irreparably changed.  There is no going back to my pre-stroke life.  I continue to wait for the day when I’ll get off the fence and realize, my sight is not coming back. …

As I was saying in my last post, life post-stroke gets messy.  I had someone come out to replace the wall-mounted garage door opener last week.  I let him upsell me, he seemed like a nice kid.  So, he was replacing all the wheels on the door except for two, because two were long-stemmed. (?). …

Another side effect of the stroke for me is right arm and hand weakness.  It’s not terrible. I’m right-handed, and since the stroke my left-hand functions better than my right, but the right is still my go-to.  This is not tragic.  It is what it is.  But coupled with the right-sided visual impairment, it’s totally…

The other evening after dinner, Ashley went upstairs—I thought to bed.  But then started hearing some noises, not being able to identify the clanging and screeching, I muted the TV and waited.  “Will you please come help me?”, Ashley asks “Sure, what are you doing? “ As I come up the steps I see Ash…

Every day I wake up and it’s another day.  I feel so lost in this new world.  I need to start having some sort of schedule, otherwise, the day is lost to YouTube, news articles, and computer games.  Maybe I should look at it like prisoners sometimes do, “yeah, I can do six months, I’ll…

It’s funny how I try to minimize what I’m going through.  Like this is a scrape on the knee and I need to get on with my life.  When I was very young, eight to be exact; my second eldest brother was a senior in high school.  He went out to his car and found…

A long time ago a doctor told me the difference between religion and spirituality was religion was for people who feared hell and spirituality is for people who’ve been there. I’m not sure this is especially true, but it gave me an opening to explore. I’m not a religious person, I’m a very spiritual person,…

Today I started the process of dissolving my business.  I feel defeated by the stroke sometimes, but I can’t fully blame the stroke.  I had about six years prior to the stroke to develop and get it up and running.  It’s still a viable product, I just don’t have the wherewithal to sell it.  Really…

When I came home from the hospital my brain would not cooperate with anything.  I couldn’t get the words out to ask simple questions, I would not recognize letters or words.  I’ve mentioned the knife issues and the ironing. My brain just didn’t want to work. When I was in the hospital, I was told…

Lately, I’m searching for something.  Granted, I’ve spent lots of time in therapy over the years, in 12 step groups, had acupuncture, massage, prayer, meditation – before having a stroke.  Recently, I went to a medium, inquired about past-life regression, sent off for DNA analysis, and saw yet another therapist.  I’m searching. I think it…