Empathy Goes A Long Way

When I first came home from the hospital, I was shocked at how much I cried, (I’m not normally a crier, well except for things like weddings and saying goodbye to colleagues or speaking from my heart).  And, how suddenly it would happen.  I could be watching TV and I would be overwhelmed with tears, heartbreak, and sadness.  At first, it would happen nearly daily, sometimes for five minutes sometimes for an hour.  I had to let it out, this was imperative for me.  Also, I had to get better at labeling my emotions because there were so many!  When I needed to cry, I’d seek out my wife, sometimes I would spontaneously start to cry on the phone with one of my sisters.  When I could get more specific, I’d text my sister and just say “I’m so heartbroken”.  Her reply would usually be, “I can’t imagine Julie” and that’s all I needed, that validation in just four words in a text message would make all the difference in my day.

My wife uses the term “Intermittent Grief”, grief that comes and goes, and takes a lot of time to work itself out.  I think that’s a great term for the emotional rollercoaster I’ve been on, and I imagine many people who have suffered a stroke have experienced it.  

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